It's that time again! Another weekend post in my friendship series! Quick recap, I've shared with you some of my experiences, talked about how to find friends, and how to make friends. Maybe you've made it this far. You've found some people with shared interests and you've hung out a bit, but how do you make it last?
To go along with my dating comparisons, you're ready to "go steady" (omg, do kids even say that anymore? Hahah, I remember in high school [I graduated in '01] I'd be all like, "I'm going out with Mikey" or "Becky is going out with Seth" and my mom would ask, "Where are you going?" "Mommmmm," I'd sigh and roll my eyes, "we're not going anywhere, it's just means we're boyfriend girlfriend" haha. Ah, the good old days.)
Anyway! How do you get to be in a serious/committed (lol) friendship with someone?
I can sum it up in three words:
There's no magical recipe to be BFF-dom. (at least not that I've found). What I have discovered is you get out of a friendship what you put in. So those "dates" I mentioned going on to get to know your new friend? You have to keep doing that. Continue going to coffees, lunches, dinners, brunches, movies, etc. so you can constantly build on the foundation you started.
If you have shared interests, do them together--go to the pool, the beach; play tennis; go hiking; go shopping! Whatever it is you (or she) likes, do it together! Include her in decisions you're making; problems you're having; thoughts you're thinking.
Talk to her! Call her, text her, email her, Facebook her, Tweet her--whatever your preferred way of communication is--do that! (I'm not gonna lie, this is the one I'm not very good at. I love getting emails from people, but I am sooo horrible at replying! If I don't write back as soon as I get it; I will probably forget all about it).
And above all; be honest. Be honest about who you are. Don't try to be someone you think people want to like, be someone who YOU like and others will like you:) (that's so fortune cookie-ish, but I promise it's true:)
And if they don't like you; they really shouldn't be your friend. You are too wonderful a person to waste your time on non-friend-worthy people.